It’s Getting Better

The more I explore my body, the more I enjoy it. My twofold goal is to understand how God designed me as a woman, and to prepare to be a sexy wife,   I read back over my early posts, both the fictional ones and the real-life accounts. I think to myself, “Wow, I’ve learned a lot!” And it isn’t just mental knowledge I’m gaining.  Through the goodness of the Lord, my body is adjusting to “thinking” sexually and welcoming those sensations.  To be blunt, things are feeling good! I’ll give you an update.

Two days ago, I had an absolutely wonderful masturbation session.  I started, as usual, with some towel-grinding, then sat with my back against the bed and fingered myself while watching the show in the mirror.  I was carrying on an imaginary conversation with my future husband, teasing him, asking him if he liked watching me.  At the time, I had the house to myself, which was nice, so I felt a lot freer (though I still kept my voice low).  I was wet in seconds.  I’m trying to really take note throughout my monthly cycle of how my body reacts to stimulation and what it’s feeling.

On this occasion, I had just come off my period and I was ready for some serious self-care, including using my vibe.  I easily slid a finger inside my pussy (which in itself was remarkable; usually it takes quite some time to warm up and loosen) and fingered around while palming the top of my cleft.  It sure felt good.  Then, since I was so loose and slippery, I got my vibe out.  I rubbed it in my juices and pushed it in.  There was zero resistance!

And here’s where it got better: I could literally feel that slim, smooth, dildo-like vibe sliding along my inner walls.  It’s as if the nerves in my vagina are waking up to whatever object is invading that space and saying, “Hey, we need to send some signals here!” It’s no longer numb.  I don’t know if this is just a miraculous change in my body, or if it’s because of where I was in my cycle.  I intend to keep monitoring that!

Anyhow, I screwed myself in a lot of different positions, trying to find the sweetest spot.  I find I like lying on my right side, left leg up and hooked on the edge of the bed.  The sideways stance seems to grant me the ability to reach usually unreachable places deep within.  I was rolling my hips on the vibe, pulling it in and out. Not all the way out, but just to the point where I could feel the rounded head expand my opening. I was also picturing some very hot loving with my future husband.

I was a soaking, dripping mess; fingers were sticky, vulva was sloppy.  Sounds gross by itself, but now that I’m fully embracing my God-given sexuality, I love it.  I felt that warm wave of convulsing muscles taking over in my core. Laying flat on my back, I shook and my mouth pulled open by the force.  That was, I believe, the strongest orgasm I’ve ever had.  It lasted quite a few seconds, maybe ten.  I was still trembling as it receded.  I thought maybe my pussy muscles were going to at last figure out how to squirt.  Not this time, but I gained hope. When I pulled the vibe out, a river of fluid followed and oozed down my crack.  I was shocked when I felt it.  I’ve never had an immediate post-climax “ejaculation” like that.

Often when I go use the restroom after I masturbate, I’ll see a stream of cum flow out. I assume this is because I’m in a vertical position.  This was new because I was flat on my back.  Though my head was still a jumble of pleasure chemicals, I praised God for another step towards true sexual enjoyment.  For me, it’s literally getting better the more I do it.  I’m sure marriage is going to be, as some folks say, a “whole ‘nuther story.” But I’m WAY more exited for it than ever before.  I think God is telling me sex doesn’t have to be painful or boring, as it is for many women.  There are answers, though some of us have to search harder and longer than others.

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